Swimming

One thing I was really excited to do after activation was swim. :)  My parents have a pool so I grew up swimming a lot, but as an adult, I HATED swimming with people because I couldn't hear.  Hearing aids and water do not mix well.  Outside of family, there are only a handful of people I could handle swimming with just because I got really anxious when I couldn't hear...more on that later.  When my adorable little "nephew" and "niece" surprised me with a visit last week, one of the first things we did was get in the pool! :)  I had been swimming with them before, but this was the first time I'd ever been able to play with them in the water.  They are 3 and 5 and very imaginative and fun right now.  Brynna announced that, "Bub is a mean shark and I'm a dolphin running away.  And you're my best friend."  That was - by far - my favorite post-activation moment. :)

The main thing I'm realizing now is how much I missed before I could hear.  I assumed that hearing aids worked well and I was hearing most of what everyone else did, but I was SO wrong.  It's the little things that get me, things like playing in the pool. Hearing the kids laugh when we spin around in circles or being able to help Brynna jump in the water...those are things I never thought about or even realized I was missing, but those are priceless moments.

I don't usually post pictures of myself in a swimsuit on the internet (YIKES!) but a lot of people who read this are considering getting an Esteem.  Unless you've been deaf or hard of hearing, you don't understand the panic that comes with not hearing in social situations.  I think these pictures do a really good job of showing the difference. :)  I can't describe how amazing it was to actually PLAY in the pool and enjoy it!

This is really personal and I'll probably regret posting it, but if you know me in real life, you know my greatest desire is to have a family.  I struggle with understanding why I still don't have that...but being with the kids last week showed me how much easier life as a mom will be now that I can hear.  For the first time, I was able to talk to the kids while I was driving.  I could never understand them without lip-reading before.  I could hear them at night and when they were upstairs and I was downstairs.  Had life gone the way I planned, I would already have kids by now...but maybe this is all part of God's plan for me.  He knew this miracle was coming and that I'd be able to experience it.  Maybe it's part of the reason for the wait! :)