It feels odd posting on here now because having two working ears seems normal now. I'm still amazed every day and hope that I never lose that, but it feels natural to hear now. I have had a few "firsts" lately to share! I LOVE music and am very thankful that I can experience music in a whole new way now. I can hear intricate details and distinguish instruments. I can ENJOY music that I used to hate because now I can hear the sounds instead of a roar. It is nothing short of wonderful!! Since my first Esteem was activated, I've wanted to attend a love concert but never had a chance until last week. I was pretty nervous that it would be too loud or I'd be hypersensitive, but at TWO different shows in very different venues, I didn't even have to use my remote! It was soooo much fun to really enjoy a concert. The company wasn't so bad either. ;). After almost a year with one Esteem, I can't believe how different so many experiences are. It's surpassed my greatest dreams.
Lately, I've been thinking about growing up without hearing. I was really fortunate to be able to function with hearing aids, but now I get how awful they are and how much I really did have to struggle. High school would have been a completely different experience if I'd been able to hear. Part of me wishes I'd never had to go through all of the hard things that I did. However, I get to experience a miracle every day. Those of you who know me know that I worry about everything and over analyze everything. It's no fun and it's NOT ok for a Christian. It's always been a struggle for me. This Esteem journey, though, has changed a lot. God made me able to hear. He did that! I never dreamed that would happen but it did! Knowing that helps me trust in other situations. If God can heal me, He can take care of everything else. Being able to see (well, hear haha!) God work like that is so worth every painful hearing related experience I've ever had. He is amazing. I am constantly in awe.
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