Paranoia

Life is GRAND with two working ears. It's been a little over a month since my last surgery and I feel fantastic. There is very little pain at the implant site and it only occurs when I touch it. I am so blessed and so thankful. 

The only problem is paranoia. Is it possible to get PTSD from medical stuff?? For the last few weeks, I've been waking up in the middle of nightmares in which I am sitting in my surgeon's office being told he's going to have to remove the device again. That was a horrific nightmare when it actually happened and I do NOT enjoy the recurring nightmares now.  I check the incision at least 5 times a day. If you are in the medical field and I know you in real life, I've asked you to look at it, too. I'm still applying neosporin twice a day, which is only required for 5 days post op. I only wash my hair every other day to avoid any unnecessary pressure and/or water. I've considered driving 3 hours JUST so my surgeon can look at the incision...even though he told me it looked great 2 weeks ago. I actually wish my hair weren't growing back so fast so I could see the incision.  I am PARANOID. 

Isn't it great to have something so wonderful that the thought of losing it makes me paranoid? I am so thankful. I never thought it would be possible to be MORE grateful for my Esteems...but I am. I can enjoy life when I can hear. This is an amazing work of God.